Like what Mary Alice/Angela of Desperate Housewives had so sagely noted, kissing is a versatile human language, it’s almost a universal need. It expresses love, precaution, lust, warning, hospitality, power, privilege, hypocrisy, pretension, and other messages no other language could convey as well.

In fact, it’s so common and fairly innocent in the name of entertainment in Desperate Housewives that recently, for the first time, I didn’t feel weird having my 15-year-old under-exposed brother and (possibly menopause-ing) mother in a room (partially) filled with raging hormones. Who would have thought that all that sex, lies, and scandals would have been the one bond that holds my family closer than blood ties?

On a related note, if you’ve been in at least one committed relationship that ran on a regular basis in the offline world, there is a high chance that your upper torso (at the least) has been savored like a gingerbread house in Hansel and Gretel. You don’t even need to read paperback erotica or watch Hollywood soft porns to know that men like hair and ears. Or rather, men who are familiar with their women won’t take on a voyage dodging the hair and ears of the seven seas to seek the ultimate land of facial skin and supple lips. They just kiss their way there as they please.

In fact, at the height of passion, I doubt that anyone would stop smelling the roses just because their lovelies aren’t soaked with Lux, Dettol, or Shokubutsu 24/7. Such carnal pleasures are indeed hard to miss. It’s kinda like, once tried, its feelings would supposedly be forever etched to that secretly horny little mind. Necessary for procreation after all.

And so the experienced you won’t really bother asking why some people kiss this way and that. Why some people screw around (I didn’t know that SAA existed before this show). Why some see sex as a need.

You won’t actually express disgust when you see that people don’t always kiss just the lips, but the hair and ears too.

Seems like someone hasn’t gotten any for a long time.