It’s funny how as much as people learn from the past, mistakes or not, history tends to repeat itself.

It’s probably not something pleasant either. Humans tend to count their losses more than their gains. After all, if all was that swell, it wouldn’t have been history in the first place.

It would’ve still been in the present.

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It’s not so much about whether you’re blind enough to repeat what you know to be painful or not. It’s also not about how fun some mistakes are for repeats. The toddler remembers that the flight from the top of the stairs isn’t as cracked up as Superman made it seem to be. The best friend remembers that no amount of social power can make up for that loneliness only true friends can amend. The hopeless romantic knows that her emotions are too fragile for commitment shitheads phobes to run their test drives. The mother of three swears never to be like her mother, in hope her children will never hate her.

Oh, no. You don’t repeat those mistakes. You try your best not to. And theoretically, they don’t happen again.

Yet, the toddler still falls. The best friend gets back-stabbed. The mother wakes up one day to a nursery home. The romantic falls again, because that’s the only way she knows how to love, but she doesn’t see her happy ending.

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The abstract. You can never plan for the infinite.

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Different people, different methods, different processes, different issues, same ending.

It’s always that same dread; same fear; same abandonment; same emptiness; same loneliness; same desperation.

Disappointments can only vary so much.

The same fucking ending. And you don’t know why.

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Sometimes, I wish that life isn’t defined by its sufferings. It’s almost as if instead of appreciating its goodness, fear takes over instead, rendering true happiness quite pointless apart from teasing you with the has beens and tantalizing you with what comes may.

Sometimes, I wonder what’s the point of the ideal if reality won’t let it come true.

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My Sociology teacher once said: “I wish to unlearn everything I’ve learned before.” I think she’d need a good teacher if her wish comes true and ironically, they say experience is the best teacher.

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I don’t know. Forget Click and the Butterfly Effect. Maybe life’s too short for a Fast Forward button but it’d be nice to use an Undo button once in a while.

Shortcuts and cheat codes can be pretty nice breaks once in a while. Especially when you’ve been stuck in the same goddam level for a pretty long time.

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Or maybe shit just happens. Bad shit somehow happen to the good guys. Yin and yang. You reap what you sow. What a load of dung.

C’est la vie, a fucking contradiction.

Excuses, excuses. I really don’t see the justification in this.

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Then again, sometimes, you just realize that history repeats itself to remind you of who you really are, what you’ve really been through, and what you’re really made of.

There are just some things that will never change.

And because of that, you realize that you cannot hold on to certain things, no matter how much you need or want them at the time, because life may be too short for reruns of the past.

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Carpe diem. The movies always make it seem so easy.